Empathise With This

A play on the film title Analyse This (or should that be That), maybe one's the sequel of the other. Shut up. Anyway, I was just reflecting on a recent episode of an Antiques Roadshow - one of those where they show highlights of episodes in their archive. Well, once upon a time they were in Dumfries (Scotland) and there was this couple with a glass vase they'd dug out of their loft 'cos they heard the show was coming to their town. You see, they'd bought a plant at a car boot sale, and when it died that's where they'd bunged the thing it was in. However, might as well see if it's worth anything, probably get laughed at and told to shove off. They'd paid a pound for the plant, with the glass vase-thingy thrown in.

There they were then, on the telly, with this expert waffling on about this vase; "Did you know it was Lalique?" he said. "Naw", the blank looks might have added "What's a laleek, then?". Well the expert droned on a bit more and then got to the interesting bit. "It's probably valued in the range of £25,000 to £30,000", he finally declared. Blank looks, looking at one another, glancing at the beaming expert, and then the inevitable "Oh my God!".

It didn't take them long to exchange that glass plant pot for Twenty-Six thousand lovely smackers.

But here's what I was reflecting on. What if the guy who flogged it to them for a pound was watching that show. Sick as a parrot doesn't come close to how he must have been feeling. More like suicidal. Let's hope he just drank himself unconscious that night. No, let's be more merciful. Let us hope he, and anyone who knew what he'd flogged for a quid, didn't watch the show, and that he remains blissfully ignorant of what became of his giveaway plant pot.

Amen to that.

p.s. He might read this, though.

"Nah, extremely unlikely . . . . . I hope".